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[konpeito_aji]

I bite when I'm happy too.

[Ugh... Klaus that's...]

[Completely and totally fair.]

[Nobunaga curls up around Klaus like a warm weighted blanket, or emotional support lion.]

That's not... actually... true. In Hell. I had to consider my entire army always. I wasn't allowed to do whatever I wanted. I was never free. I couldn't even sail away to go exploring without resolving the entire country first. I couldn't get injured or Hideyoshi would go insane, and try to get revenge, and try to become the Demon King instead, and he's better than that.

I do have to consider how... everything I do affects others. Including you, even though you are not a weapon to be used by anyone. You are just zen.

[HUG! HUG HUG HUG!]

The only other woman I ever loved was named Kitsuno. I hate hearing her name, so do not mention it outside of this.

She was tortured by--

[Oh. He's crying. Why is he crying?]

[He tries to blink it away, but it's still coming???] By the gods. I guess. Or health. Or just fate. I don't know. She was the world to me for a long time. [Stop crying.] I couldn't tell her I loved her, because politics, and she was dying, so it would have been cruel and pointless. When she died, the religious told me it was her time. That it was destiny, for her to be tortured, and die, and I just... couldn't accept it. I know if I made the country better, then--

[He would REALLY like to stop crying now.]

[Ugh, he just lays sideways and briefly covers his head with a pillow until he can compose himself.]

[And gently bops Klaus with the pillow when he's calm enough.]

So I ... I don't want you to feel like that. But even just looking after my soldiers is why Ari was able to write in the clause anyway. [Hiccup. And another light pillow bop.] It's not that I'm not thinking about how it could affect someone, if I was, I wouldn't have asked you in the first place. It's that... to me it's still worth the price. If the world is some kind of place that people get tortured and no one things it can get better, then it doesn't deserve to exist anyway. [Finger over Klaus' lips again.] But I know it can get better. I have seen it.

[busball]

[Klaus makes an annoyed huff.] Then I should have heard about the Siffleur thing from you before you did it. Not like you undied the next day and things are fine. Cause I still had to deal with the emotional after effect, okay?

[At least no one else has to worry about taking over as the demon king here But that's not the point. The point is communicating. This is a relationship. And if they're gonna make it work, they need to talk about things.] I'm not a weapon. Yeah.

[But now he's getting sad and they frown a little, just listening. The crying is...new. They really don't like the crying or the reason for the crying. Klaus knows what it is to not be able to tell someone you love them fully in the public eye. Maybe not so much not being able to tell the person he loved. But it was mostly in private, hardly ever something he could say to other people. It probably didn't stop the looks at him that showed how much they loved him. Dave was so...good. If this Kitsuno person was someone like Dave for Nobunaga, then...that was terrible. To watch someone you loved die.]

[Klaus lets out a soft, complaint as he's hit with the pillow before moving himself to cuddle his boyfriend. Just let them kiss your cheeks and lightly wipe the tears away some more for you.]

[Does he want Klaus to fight a pillow? Klaus will fight a pillow. As it stands, Klaus is gonna lick his finger cause he's tired of said finger being pressed against his lips. If Nobunaga doesn't move his finger fast enough, they're probably just gonna inappropriately bite it or put his mouth around it.]

I'd still like some heads up and warning. This is a relationship and we need to talk to each other. Like...are you fine if I learn knife lessons from Blackbeard? [Practice what you preach or whatever.] He offered. We got drunk and I sang my favorite, least sexy Destiny's Child song.

[konpeito_aji]

[Whines at the finger sucking! Thanks Klaus, he really needed to be horny for this conversation too!]

There is no unsexy Destiny's Child from you. [Ugh.]

[Talking.]

[Okay.]

[Is Nobunaga okay with Klaus learning knives from Blackbeard.] When did Blackbeard come back?

[Oh but --]

[Nobunaga tries hard to think about this.] And you think he will not treat you like a weapon?

[Whatever. Does he care? Is it bothering him? Does he have emotions about this in any direction at all?]

[He has no idea right now. Everything is such a haze of misery.]

[He wants to teach Klaus how to deal with knives, throw them, and the rest. But he doesn't think (?) he's jealous about it. Right now, he can't feel anything but ice.]

Learn knives. Not an order. I want you to be happy, idiot. [Bops him again with the pillow!]

[busball]

[Well, this is what he gets or whatever.]

It was Survivor. It’s basically a whatever song. I mean a good one, but it wasn’t like…say…Lose My Breath. [They don’t know if they’ve sung that one for him yet, but…]

Liiiike recently? I have just been as unweird as I can cause I only met him once and I snapped and told him he sounded like my dad. [Woops] But he’s definitely a loooooot more unhinged now.

[As for that question.] He has no reason to. I didn’t join his crew. I’m just teaching him singing and stuff in return. Also I have no interest in being a pirate. Just giving myself a little more ability to not die immediately. Is all.

[They are thinking about that whole conversation and how fuzzy things got at the end.] Also I told him he should check out the knife club and maybe poetry club? Cause he writes songs apparently! He refused to sing them for me, but I hope he does one day.

[Klaus makes a noise at the five millionth (and exaggeration) pillow bop.] Bop me with that pillow one more time and I swear to every god in existence… [What does he swear? Well, that’s a surprise for Nobunaga and him]

[konpeito_aji]

Before or after you told him about me? [Because otherwise Blackbeard could totally think the song was proof that Nobunaga and Klaus were over.]

[Nobunaga still has no idea if even HAS feelings about this.]

[But he knows one thing he definitely has emotions about!]

[Being told what to (or not) do! And this is the same as the Captain getting dared, or when Valdis told him not to think lewdly about Klaus.]

[BOP!]

[busball]

After I told him. And I said we were dating, so nothing weird was gonna happen. I’m not hiding you. I did tell him he needed a makeover, though. He looked like a drowned raccoon. Also he didn’t stab me when I said that. So that’s winning, right?

[THAT’S IT! Klaus is definitely taking the pillow and pinning Nobunaga to the bed]

[konpeito_aji]

[Nobunaga is too numb, thinking too much, SO MUCH, that he doesn't react at all, just thinking.]

[And pinned.] You know I love you, right?

[That seems important to say, so he is.]

[He doesn't know about anything else anymore.]

[busball]

[Klaus is very aware of the lack of everything which makes him frown]

Yes. I know. And I love you, too. [To prove a point, he leans down to kiss Nobunaga on the forehead and then both cheeks, his nose, and finally his lips.]

[Then they’re just gonna lie down on top of him like a personal weighted blanket.] We can talk more later, okay? I’m sorry you’re hurting. And I’m sorry if I made it worse at all. Still love you.

[konpeito_aji]

[Ugh, Nobunaga is still too fucked up at the moment to react at first, but he does kiss back to the one on his lips at least.]

I'm hurting?

[He can't tell.]

[He gently tries to move Klaus to the side and cuddle up against his chest.] Love you too.

I don't think you made anything worse. Sometimes you have to be the smart one... and I'm sorry, because I know you do not like it.

Why don't you think I'm evil again? Oh, but you do not think Blackbeard is. So is it just your father? [Just gonna stay here, safe in Klaus' arms for a change.]

[busball]

How else do you explain it? You’re so quiet and so…this is so different from your usual. So I assume you’re hurting or upset. Cause you get quiet and shut off when something really hits you. You were like this at first after Crichton died. [He pays pretty close attention to Nobunaga.]

[They move easy, letting Nobunaga cuddle up to their chest.] Dangers of the… [Not the job] experience. Pretty sure I’m not usually the one with the one braincell in this family. Usually Viktor or Allison or Five. I’m like the stupidest one, honestly.

[Klaus moves to run his fingers through Nobunaga’s hair.] You’re not evil. You just like to be evil and say you’re evil because then you can explain away some of your behavior and act like nothing can hurt you. Trauma response or whatever.

And I’m not pretending you’ve never done anything bad before you start on all the bad stuff again. I got it. I’m just saying you have this habit. And as for Blackbeard. That guy is fucking nuts and almost definitely fucked people up and will again. He hurt Pratt, but Pratt said it’s okay. Which is a lie, but apparently no one needs to be enemies and he wants me to take pictures if I get Blackbeard to let me do his make up.

[Just out here revealing shit and stuff.] I mean, I’m always gonna have a hell of a lot of emotional baggage about my dad. He sucks and he’s not sorry about it. Sure, he might have done something for the “greater good” [Yes there ARE air quotes] But it was for his greater good, not the greater good of everyone else. He’s a fucking dick.

[konpeito_aji]

I don't remember.

I'm just thinking.

[But he likes when Klaus is like this, protective of him. He's not used to it. The closest to someone trying to protect him, is Hideyoshi, and Hideyoshi won't even let him eat candy late at night because of his teeth and whatever.]

[Trauma...]

[Nobunaga is soothed by the hair pets, but almost completely flips when Klaus says Pratt got hurt by Blackbeard.] What? [All the angry kitten with hackles completely on end.] How hurt? [>:| No, this isn't okay.]

[But about Reginald... Nobuanga softens back down and kisses Klaus' forehead.] I'm sorry. I want to protect you from that, not remind you of it.

[busball]

[Klaus will be protective of him until forever, so it's probably a good thing he likes it.[

[Uhhh....] I dunno??? Enough that he was taking like...the opium medicine from the infirmary, so probably pretty bad? Apparently they had a disagreement because of Izzy? I don't know that guy, but...yeah. I dunno. He didn't say exactly what happened?

[Klaus smiles at the kiss.] Pretty sure I'm saddled with that shit for the rest of my life, buddy. Don't think I could escape it if I wanted to.

1/2

[konpeito_aji]

[Angry kitty growls!]

[His hacks are on end again.] I will allow it if you and Pratt insist, but I'm giving him an engraved sword, and he is one of my samurai, which means I cannot allow a future attack to go unheeded.

I am also quite angry that he didn't tell me. I presume he didn't want to disappoint me, but that is exactly what I am. And furious.

And you want to learn knives with the pirate, not me, even though you know I treasure your body more than my own?

2/2

[konpeito_aji]

[Ugh but sad traumatized Klaus...]

[The hackles are still on end, but Nobunaga's face softens out of "THIS MEANS WAR" face.]

If you like Pina Coladas, and are really sexy doing yoga, and don't care that I'm a demon king, but would rather I wear a lion costume and tie than oni horns and a red cape, so long as you are on this ship with me, take my hand, [Intertwined fingers and more knuckle and finger kisses!] And I'll help you escape.

[busball]

He probably didn’t think it was a big deal? This is Pratt. Also I don’t know if I was supposed to tell you. Strictly speaking. [Bro code was a tenuous creature that Klaus was still trying to understand]

But also! Um. Wouldn’t it be a good idea for Blackbeard to like someone? [This is something that’s not exactly just occurred to Klaus, but…] I want to learn from you, too, but maybe if Blackbeard likes me. Even just as a friend, I can have some sway over things? Distract from Pratt. That would be a good thing, right?

[Who is anxious about how this sounds and how their boyfriend could feel about it? Not this…person. Okay, yeah. It’s them.]

[But then he’s singing and it’s the cutest fucking thing in this world and the next. He smiles at the hand holding and the kisses to his knuckles.] I love you. So much. You’re so weird.

[konpeito_aji]

You want to get stabbed so Pratt doesn't, do I understand that correctly?

Makeup is good, friends, dancing, singing, I'm glad you told him about me. I won't be bothered if you learn knives, but I don't think he's as competent as you think. Stede is a quick learner, but neither of them have any formal training. Their grip alone is embarrassing. And he doesnt know how to return even the most cssual kunai toss. It might be better if you just come to knife club with him, where at least the rest of us can make sure you don't bleed out. But if this is what you want, I'll not argue it.

Ehhh? Did I do something strange? [Doesn't everyone ad lib song lyrics to their partner? They should!]

It bothers you that I'm in danger. But I don't understand. I will consider you like Hideyoshi. A sexier version. One who will be a mess if I die. So I can't die, I must protect you. But then you want to get stabbed? What am I missing?

[busball]

Well, I mean, the thought did cross my mind, but...I mean, I'm gonna try not to get stabbed. It's the very last option on the list of things.

[Yep. Yes. This is what he was worried about.] I'm not gonna bleed out. And it's like...uhhh...keep your friends close and your questionable allies closer, right? [Yes, they know it's keep your enemies closer, but...]

You did something cute.

[But yeah. Fair. This is a fair thing to say to them right now.] The power of friendship?? But I will do my best not to get myself hurt. At all. And...and if I have to like...fuss less, then I will. Cause...ugh. [He's just gonna be on his back staring at the ceiling.] This place is stupid and I'm not good for very much, but if I can find a way to help Pratt, I want to. And I know I get annoying about you doing things and getting hurt, but I'm also an idiot all the time. So I dunno. Maybe we just need to give each other a heads up before we go into dangerous things. So we're not surprised. Idk what emoji to use. The poop one?

[konpeito_aji]

I'm mot cute.

[Reflex!]

[But he instantly reaches out to pull Klaus into a hug.]

I like you fussing over me. I am just not used to anyone caring if I get hurt for non-political reasons.

If you send me a poop emoji, I will want to come running to prevent you getting too hurt, or pick you up afterwards.

I will do my best to keep myself safe, because I don't want you to be sad. If things go wrong, I will send a General to look after you. You may not like it, but this is a rule in my lands. I parted with one of my best to make him a brother-in-law: Katsuie, so he could look after Oichi somewhere I cannot reach. He is the closest I have to trusting someone. It is not that I didn't consider you while playing Siffleur's game, but I thought both that I could win, learn even if I lost, and be back before you could hurt much. This is not good thinking, I'm sorry.

[Kisses Klaus' forehead!]

Peace is still something I don't understand. So I will need you to guide me through it. I will send you the dove emoji when I am lost, and cannot navigate my way out of my warrior instincts. This way you can try to prevent me from dying too.

Weapons aren't always only for war. I do not say this for you. You are zen. But everyone else. Knives are used in food production. And guns in hunting, or for fun like fireworks. Sometimes even a sword duel is just another form of communication, like dancing.

I love you as you are. Nothing you do can change that. I want to protect your freedom. So that you can do reckless things, and feel secure knowing I will be there to pick you up off the floor. Understood?

[busball]

You're so cute. Cutest of all the people.

[He's anticipating the teeth, so the hug makes him laugh.]

I do really like you, so I'm gonna worry a little. Like how you worry about me. [Light boop of Nobunaga's nose. That's right. Nobunaga's not the only one that can bop people on the nose.]

I'll allow you to come get me afterwards. And probably you can try to prevent me getting too hurt. Cause I know you'd be super worried about it. You can carry me to get my wounds fixed. And I'll tell you how absolutely handsome and strong you are.

[They snuggle in a little closer.] Yes. I know. I...can deal with that. But if you get hurt, I wanna come get you, too. Sometimes. Even if I'm not that strong. And I want kiss all your injuries. But like maybe after they're cleaned up.

[Klaus nods at the words.] I will. But you have to listen to me when I say something. Okay? And don't like get more intense cause...demon rules.

Yeah. I get it. I do. I love you, too. And I'll try to be more understanding of things from your end, okay? [A beat] Wanna just cuddle under the covers for a bit?

[konpeito_aji]

You're silly.

[A small deep laugh about carrying Klaus and being praised.] All right, I like this plan very much.

You're plenty strong.

I will listen. I always listen. I may get intense, but only in words. This is how you will know I am listening, my actions will reflect my broader plans.

[Quietly snuggles, trying to fight being shy!]

I love you too. I like when you are strong like this for me. No one's ever done that before either. Even though you don't like having to be the strong one, I am grateful. It is very sexy. [Chu!]

[busball]

Duh.

I knew you would! [Because who doesn’t actually like praise? A liar, that’s who!!! Oh. Also him sometimes when he’s feeling weird. But they are always fine with compliments about their looks. That’s never gonna change.]

I don’t even lift. [This is a joke he doesn’t actually expect Nobunaga to get.]

Okay. Good.

[Now it’s their turn to blush. Ugggghhhh] It’s not that I don’t like it. I like that I can do things for you that no one else does. And that I can make things better for you. I don’t hate it. I just…I dunno. Like…I’m just insecure about stuff and I worry I’m just…not good at it and that I’m…you know. The voice in my head you’re always complaining about.

[konpeito_aji]

That's okay. I don't lift either. Just you. And that's cheating because you levitate.

[Guh! So cute!!! He will die of cuteness! The ultimate technique!]

[A gentle kiss!] Then I will crush it ruthlessly! With kisses. [MORE kisses!]

[busball]

I can just be dead weight if you really want. No help at all.

[The kisses make them happy and they pull him closer.] I love you. I want you to never forget that.

[konpeito_aji]

Nah, I like you like this. If my arms start losing tone, I'll figure something out. Maybe go do some lifting with Teyrey.

I love you too. I don't want to forget either. I want to go back in time and tell myself that everything is worth it. So long as I keep moving forward I'll get to meet you.

[busball]

You could lift me up by my ass. Call it butt curls. [Definitely too much mischief in this one person.] By which, I mean, your hands would be on my ass and I'd probably be facing you, so you could just give me a kiss as you lifted me up. That's reasonable, right?

[There it is. The long stare that is Klaus being hit by something so adorably romantic that they do not know how to react to it. Except to stare into space. How do you even react to that?]